Regardless of our age or diagnoses, change can be really hard. For children, who are still developing their understanding of the world and their coping skills, it can be even more challenging, especially if the child in question has a behavioral health condition. For many young people, returning to school in the fall is a time of mixed feelings, with excitement about seeing friends and also worries about what to expect. At Highland Hospital Behavioral Health, in Charleston, West Virginia, we want to give parents the tools they need to support their children as they return to class.
Practicing the Skills
Even children who like school run into challenges at times that they may be unsure how to handle or that bring forth big feelings. Help them prepare for those sorts of situations by:
- Saying, “I can try this,” instead of “I can’t do it”.
- Validating their feelings and reminding them that other people may be feeling the same way, even if they don’t say so.
- Teaching them coping skills like grounding exercises, which they can use to calm themselves even when they are away from you.
- Recognizing that behavioral issues, attendance problems, and other academic concerns may be a sign of medical or mental health needs and taking them to see their doctor for assessment, especially if you also observe signs such as frequent tantrums or irritability, stress that is more than typical, inability to stay still, trouble sleeping at night or staying awake during the day, changes in appetite or being overly concerned with weight, diet and/or exercise, statements about people trying to control them or hurt them, or indications that they might be seeing/hearing things no one else is experiencing.
Predictability for the Win
You won’t be able to anticipate and prepare your child for every experience they will be having this school year, but implementing consistent routines at home can:
- Improve mental and physical health
- Lower stress levels
- Reduce disruptive behaviors
Deciding What Routines You Need
Your child is a unique individual and what works best for them will depend on your family’s dynamics and your child’s preferences.
- Start small. Get your child’s opinion and focus on one or two things at first. While they might initially not like the idea of establishing a routine, once you have one or two in place and they see how helpful it can be, they might be interested in adding more later.
- Focus on what matters most. Think about the areas where your child struggles, such as getting out the door, sleep, homework completion, and eating healthy, well-balanced meals.
- Add to what is already working. What does your child already do consistently? Adding something new right after that might make it easier for your child to follow through. For example, if your child struggles to leave the house on time because they cannot decide on an outfit, but they are already really consistent about getting homework done on time, you might have them start picking out their clothes the night before, as soon as they finish their homework. If they struggle to find their shoes and backpack in the morning, designate a spot for these items and have them double-check that they are in place before bed. If it is difficult to fall asleep, but they have a good evening bath time routine, start implementing sleep hygiene practices, like dimming lights, turning off electronics, reading a book, or meditating after they finish their shower.
- Have a backup plan. Weekends, holidays, weather, sports, appointments, and other breaks in routine can mess things up if you don’t have a strategy in mind. Think about what things will look like and communicate with children in advance. If a child is struggling with sleep, letting them stay up late or sleep in on the weekends or on school breaks will make it harder for them to stay on a good sleep schedule. If boredom leads to behavioral concerns, you might want to have a calendar your kids can consult for what will be happening on non-school days. Additionally, having a reason to get homework and chores done, such as a fun activity, can make it more likely that your child will follow through with your requests.
- Be the change you want to see. Don’t just ask your kid to set and follow routines; do it yourself. It’s good for your mental and physical health and also teaches your child that what you’re asking is just a part of living a healthy life.
At Highland Hospital Behavioral Health, we want young people to have the support they need to have optimal mental health. We offer inpatient behavioral health treatment for children as young as eight and can provide support to their families.
